i'm having a "war" with my own stand, perspective, beliefs and principles with other's perspective, beliefs, principles and the "right rules". i loaf having to regret and hoping that i could turn back time only to change everything. but that's my way of communicating and expressing myself. some say "kalau simpan dalam hati lama-lama nanti boleh jadi biol" and i have to agree with that. but wont it hurt other's feelings? contradictions is all it spells to me. on one side, it's my feelings that i have to "attend" to & on another side, it's others feelings that i have to take care of. so what the conclusion would be? i never had an answer to it. i thought perhaps i needed someone to talk to so that i wont be too overwhelmed to say everything out. when the time's right, at times it does solves the problem. at times it makes things worst.

just so you know, no matter how hard i try i can never bring myself to be the best. so dont expect me to become that angel all the time. i'm not that perfect human next door. at times i'll try to understand, but you've got to understand me too. i cant bring myself to be a hypocrite. i can be cruel. so dont blame me if i were to shoot everything right to your face. do some justice to yourself at least. every actions have its reasons. you bring me to it.